David Lynch Coffee Commercial – Directed By David Lynch (I’m scared.)

Honestly. I like to act like I'm all badass and nothing scares me all that much.  Psssh. I'm scared of a lot of things, but I'm especially scared of David Lynch's brain and vision of life seen through his eyes--even if it's about a gotdamn cup of coffee.

Mr. Lynch now has his own brand of coffee.  He admits to being "obsessed with coffee" in a piece he wrote for Huffington Post, which you can read in its entirety HERE:

For a long time, outside of diners, I drank a lot of instant coffee and I would drink it from styrofoam cups. For many years, I drank probably 20 cups of instant coffee per day. One of the things I discovered from drinking coffee in a styrofoam cup was a kind of fantastic visual trick. If you have a full styrofoam cup of coffee and you move the cup slowly on a certain type of surface, a vibration will come forth and ripples will appear on the surface of the coffee. And if you push the cup a little bit faster as it's vibrating, individual droplets will leap out of the ripples and dance all along the surface of the coffee. I always wanted to film this effect, but I never have. And nowadays, the environmentalists tell us that styrofoam cups aren't so good, so I haven't had an opportunity to see this trick filmed.

Take a look at the commercial for David Lynch Coffee, won't you?

Ugh. Now I'm wigging out. Those flashing lights. The tension-filled score. I'm envisioning Bob, Leland Palmer, fish in the coffee maker, socks full of bars of soap -- I just can't.