Oh, that Charlie Sheen! A Felony?? (Where’s the canned laughter?)

Ha...remember when Charlie pretended to be a normal dude for a minute? Yeah. Me neither.

Guess who's being charge with felony menacing and misdemeanor mischief. The criminal complaints are expected to be filed as early as Friday morning.

Let's all think back to a snowy Christmas morning in Aspen, Colorado just a few weeks ago.  Charlie was arrested by Aspen police following a domestic dispute with wife Brooke Mueller, who reportedly checked into a hospital, then a rehabilitation clinic, after the incident.  (We've found a new reason to go to rehab: Pneumonia. And, you're welcome.)  So now Sheen is estranged from his wife under a restraining order, which was temporarily lifted last month to accommodate a hospital visit, and will be reevaluated at his court hearing.

According to TMZ:

"..he is “not expected to enter a plea” regarding the assault charges, but hopes to “relax the protective order prohibiting any contact [with Mueller].”

Here's the rub:  Charlie's still the highest paid sitcom actor on television.  Why do I have a feeling this crap will all disappear in a few months--weeks, even?  He'll do a few interviews, show up on Larry King, maybe.  Eventually, The View, and use that a-hole Mel Gibson's now infamous words: I've done all the necessary mea culpas. Let's move on."

And the ratings for Two and a Half Men will continue to stay in the stratosphere.