Tag Archives: Complete and Utter Douche

Today’s Blind Item – This Teenage Boy Singer Will Break Up With Her If She Gains More Weight

 

What A list tweener singer told his on again and off again B list tweener girlfriend they would be off again unless she lost some weight. He said he doesn’t like to see any fat and that she was getting “too curvy” for his own liking and embarrassing him in front of his friends by getting big. When she started crying, he said it was her problem, not his.

via CDaN

Uhhhh…excuse me?? That little brat is about to learn the hard way about what one does and doesn’t say to your girlfriend. I apologize in advance for knowing who this must be…because photos like THESE are floating around the Internet today.

Yes. That’s the darling Selena Gomez up there, and I’m pretty sure you know who her boyfriend is, don’t you? Complete and utter bullshit.

And now I’m pissed off.

Ashton Kutcher Headed To Outer Space

THIS douchebag.

In Douchebag Space Travel News, the Two and A Half Men and some-other-stuff-star is the 500th “astronaut customer” to sign up for a trip on Virgin Galactic, the space line founded by billionaire Sir Richard Branson.

 I gave Ashton a quick call to congratulate and welcome him,” Branson wrote in a blog post Monday. ”He is as thrilled as we are at the prospect of being among the first to cross the final frontier (and back!) with us and to experience the magic of space for himself.”

Tickets for the flight are $200,000 for a two-and-a-half hour flight and require a $20,000 deposit. Kutcher won’t actually be leaving earth until sometime next year, so there’s plenty more time for him to annoy us down here.

Of course, he isn’t the only celeb to sign up for the once in a lifetime space trip, reportedly Katy Perry, Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie and world renowned physicist (and stripper enthusiast) Stephen Hawking have also bought tickets.

I say we leave Ashton and Katy up there. Seriously.

 

Today’s Blind Item – Horribly Bad Boyfriend Edition

So, this recovering former A list tweener was out the other night and this is what her boyfriend said to her. “One drink is not going to hurt you baby.” Yeah, her celebrity boyfriend has always been a sleaze and always will be.

via: CDaN

 

This mother-effer always goes after waaaay younger girls, who oddly end up screwed up and in rehab.  He’s gross.  (IF it’s whom I think it is…)  And I thought about the song, Bad Boyfriend by Garbage when I read this Blind Item.  Lyrics and video, anyone?  Why, yes, thank you!

Bad Boyfriend – Garbage

I’ve got a fever
Come check it and see
There’s something burning and rolling in me
We may not last but we’ll have fun till it ends
C’mon baby be my bad boyfriend

I wanna hear you call out my name
I wanna see you burn up in flames
Keep you on ice so I can show all my friends
C’mon baby be my bad boyfriend

So ripe so sweet come suck it and see
But watch out Daddy I sting like a bee
I know some tricks I swear will give you the bends
C’mon baby be my bad boyfriend

My fever’s rising you ran into luck
Say what sugar
You wanna get what?
I’m wanna give you one hundred and ten
C’mon baby be my bad boyfriend

It’s wild the way you tease me
It’s wild the way you free me
It’s wild the way you reach me
Wrapped me up in your wire from the start

You’ve got the women waiting in line
I’m not asking you to make up your mind
But I can make you happy at least now and then
I’ve got something special for my bad boyfriend

If you can’t love me honey go on just pretend
I’ve saved something special for the very end
If you can’t love me honey go on just pretend
C’mon baby be my bad boyfriend

This little gal’s parents better step IN.