Disapproving Headshake | Dipped In Cream

22Jul/1014

Let’s talk about Jaden and Willow Smith for a moment, shall we?

Jaden (The Smug!) Smith

Willow (Baby, I'mma a ROCKSTAR) Smith. She's 9 years old, people.

I think I've made it clear in the past that I do not care for Jaden Smith. He presents himself as a smug, spoiled brat, and I think his parents encourage his childish elitism. Now we have little sister, Willow, who appears to think she's Rihanna. And, why may I ask, is this little girl signing autographs in London? Because she made a cameo in a movie one of her dad's films?

Here's the thing. I did allow my son Hunter to "express himself" when he was in 5th and 6th grade. We went through the bleached, spikey hair, black nailpolish, and even...wait for it...tiny butterfly clips. Yeah. I know. Hunter got so much sh*t from every teacher--except his OWN teacher, the wonderful Mrs. Waterman, for wearing those clips. So naturally, being the hot-head that I was (ahem), I had to make a stink about the other small-minded teachers who kept complaining about my kid's HAIR. Say it with me: "Ahhh, HELLLL NAAAWW!" I gotta give it to the Principal, though. She was great and agreed that the teachers who said Hunter's hair was "distracting" were full of crap, (my words) and being sexist, thus allowing him to do whatever he wanted with his hair.

Take a gander, won't you? (Again. Thank the Lawd that Hunter doesn't read Mama's blog...he'd kill me.)

Ahhh, yes. Hunter's 10th birthday party.

and...

Hunter as Billy Idol - HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!

Hunter, age 12 1/2. What a difference 18 months made.

And...Hunter now.

So, I do believe in letting kids express themselves, apparently. I just don't don't care for smug, bratty Hollywood kids as a rule. (Clearly, the Jolie-Pitt clan are not included in this rant. Just look at Chaz Shiloh!)

Jeez. Leave to Dina Lohan Mama to turn this into a Hunter post.

Written by: Diva Julia

17Jul/104

Katie Holmes as Jackie O and 4 year-old Suri is still swaddled and carried in her blankie.

We GET it, Katie. You're a MOM! Put Stinkfoot DOWN already!

Oh forpitysake.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Katie Holmes has been cast and is working on a mini-series about Jackie Kennedy-Onassis. Honk shoooo. The mini-series will be under scrutiny, both for Katie's wardrobe and whether or not she duplicate Jackie's odd manner of "whisper-speak". Nothing else will matter. (Aside from a really bad performance?)

What I'd really like to address, though, the issue of FOUR YEAR OLD Suri, who wears high heels and red lipstick at times, but yet is carted about in the arms of her parents in the heat of summer, wrapped up in her one-time use Little Giraffe blankets at ALL TIMES. I actually picture a giant-sized Kleenex box filled with these $90.00 blankets for each day's use. Some are snowy white, some are baby pink...depending on Suri's demands. Cray cray. It's not as if Katie and Suri don't have a crap-load of He Man bodyguards surrounding them, and lest we forget, Katie and Suri are clearly on set of this (possibly eye-rollingly bad) mini-series.

Spoiled Little Brat.

Written by: Diva Julia

13Jul/103

Lindsay Lohan’s “Machete” poster. A nun licking a gun.

Yep. Your every day nun.

Lindsay's Got A Gun...Photo: Trouble Maker Studios

Somehow, I don't think Lindsay will be promoting her cameo (let's face it--it's not a huge role) in Machete, director, Robert Rodriguez's latest "grindhouse" film. This photo is reminiscent of Lindsay's photo shoot with Tyler Shields, wherein she had a gun to her mouth.

In case you blocked this photo from memory, let me give you a refresher course:

Photo: Tyler Shields

Lindsay certainly likes being photographed with guns.

I understand the the producers of "Inferno", the biopic film based on the life of 70's pornstar Linda Lovelace, are waiting for Lindsay to finish her jail sentence and rehab and will not replace Lindsay with another actress. I'm going on the record to say making this film after drug and alcohol rehab and therapy is the worst possible thing she could attempt.

If you dare, here is a page of the "Inferno" script. How on earth will this help Lindsay work through her own demons, by taking on a dead pornstar's demons on film? I think it could kill her. As a mother, I would try my level best to discourage my daughter from performing this kind of material...but my name isn't DINA LOHAN.

via Jezebel. *WARNING - This is NAST.*

This is plain icky. Is it just me?

Written by: Diva Julia

6Jul/102

George Michael arrested again? Yeah. Shocking.

"Say boys...what's up?"

George-bloody-Michael is at it again, y'all. Seems he rammed his Range Rover into a 24/7 photo processing shop in London over the weekend. Now all I can wonder is if he was dropping off some film or cd's for printing--and what/whom did said photos depict?

via: rttnews.com

"Police were called at approximately 3:30 AM on Sunday to reports of a vehicle in collision with a building. Officers attended and a man in his 40s was arrested on suspicion of being unfit to drive," a spokesperson for London's Metropolitan Police tells the newspaper.

"He was taken to a north London police station and later bailed to return on August 13 pending inquiries."

BOOM. Nicely done, George.

I feel George should probably hire a driver. But wait. Then he'd risk a book being written about him and all of his exploits...like we don't already know all about George's love of drugs (LOTS of weed) and anonymous sex. In fact, I learned a new word last year due to George Michael's behavior:

via UrbanDictionary.com

Cottaging -the persuit of homosexual "Acts" of an anonymous nature in pubilc lavatories via a small and well crafted hole in the cubicle wall to ensure anonymity.

"Please excuse me a second Nathanial, I'm going to check out the cottaging facilities".

Huh. All this time I just thought "cruising" was an all -inclusive phrase. Apparently, I was incorrect. Some fag-hag I am. I do apologize!

ANYgay. Let's take a look at George Michael's rap sheet, via MTV.com:

2006 - Authorities arrested Michael after the star was found slumped over in a car and blocking traffic in central London. The singer was detained on suspicion of possessing Class C drugs (Class C drugs include a range of substances, such as marijuana and painkillers) and then released on bail. Michael was involved in a similar incident just a few months later. Once again, the star was found knocked out in a vehicle and then crashed into a traffic divider when a fellow driver woke him.

2007 - Michael was barred from driving for two years after crashing into three parked vehicles and failing to notify the owners of the cars before driving away.

2008 - Even on foot, the star continued to run into trouble. The singer was arrested on drug-possession charges after an attendant caught Michael in a public restroom in London (a seemingly favored haunt for the troubled singer) with a "small amount" of marijuana and crack cocaine. Luckily for the star, Michael was not charged and was sent along with a cautionary warning.

2009 - In what appears to be an annual trend for the singer, Michael was arrested again after he crashed his Land Rover into a truck. The star was questioned and then released and later denied being inebriated in a statement: "Neither of us [the truck driver nor Michael] was charged because we were both stone cold sober." The star added, "I don't want my fans or my family worried by what they are reading all over again."

Oh, George. I still love you, but get it together, man!

Written by: Diva Julia

2Jul/103

Happy Birthday, Lindsay Lohan…(eyeroll) How ’bout a punch in the face?

I love this photo...Happy Birthday, Linds!

You know, no one could make up the kind of crap Lindsay always seems to find herself in--like getting punched by a waitress last night, while she was hanging out with that other idiot Doug Reinhardt (I seriously don't even know or CARE about this dude. I just know he was always photographed kissing/fighting with Paris Hilton while they begged for attention from the paps.).

AnyHOOKER. Lindsay Tweeted to the world about the altercation:

I just love how nothing is EVER Lindsay's fault. NOTHING. She's always being "set up". Everyone is always trying to make her look bad -- it's never LINDSAY'S bad behavior. I realize I went OFF last week about how we all know people like Lindsay. Remember the Word of the Day--ENTITLEMENTARIANISM?

Y'all heard about the big, set-up to make Lindsay look bad photoshoot that was shown on BRAVO's series Double Exposure, right? You know, where Lindsay showed up 11 hours late, looking haggard/wasted and making squinchy faces at the dirty stripper pole? (Like she hasn't had worse things inside her body...c'mon Lindsay.) Naturally, Lindsay claims BRAVO executives intentionally gave her the wrong time so she would be late. The crazy thing is for anyone to even think Lindsay could be ANYWHERE at 10:00 a.m. without an attorney dragging her flat ass to court the location. So maybe, in Lindsay's mind, it WAS a set up! How DARE they think she could get on the pole at the hour!

Oh, and I love this quote by the photographer on Double Exposure:

"I literally need to think of myself as a wildlife photographer.. There's almost a danger element to her presence," said a photographer. "You never know what's gonna happen in the next two and a half seconds. Is she gonna bite you?

That was quite possibly the biggest compliment EVER given to Lindsay. She's getting it tattooed on her scabby, clear skin as we speak.

Written by: Diva Julia

1Jul/102

Chris Brown faking the tears on BET Awards? GASP!

Glycerine. "Don't let the days go by..."

Shocker. Lots of witnesses are coming forth regarding Chris Brown's award-winning (harrr harrr) performance on Sunday night's BET Awards, wherein he bawled like a baby and couldn't get through his version of Man in the Mirror during the tribute to Michael Jackson. Yeah, I can be a bit (?) of a cynic...but most of the time I'm right. I didn't buy Brown's sympathy performance at all. Why didn't he show some emotion after he beat Rihanna to a bloody pulp and choked her into near unconsciousness? Just wondering. Instead he went jet skiing just days after the incident, looking rather arrogant if you ask me.

Chris Brown just days after being Rihanna

So. Someone blabbed about what they saw backstage at the BETs:

via USmagazine.com:

"Chris Brown caused a lot of chatter at the BET Awards Sunday when he broke down in tears during a Michael Jackson tribute.

An insider tells UsMagazine.com the crying was fake.

Before he took the stage to belt out "Man in the Mirror," a backstage source tells Us one of Brown's bodyguards gave the singer, 21, tear-inducing eye drops.

Brown's rep denies it, telling Us that Brown simply "was moved by the opportunity to pay tribute to his idol." But the witness says Brown definitely used drops.

Says the source, "He rubbed it in and he started crying."

Rihanna, that fateful night. Via TMZ

Just in case y'all forgot what Chris Brown did to Rihanna's face, here's a reminder. I'm amazed at the folks who say "ohhh, he needs to be forgiven..." without giving Rihanna much consideration. (Queen Latifah even has a new book focusing female self-esteem issues--yet, she was one of the stars who thinks Chris needs a "pass" for his "transgressions"...thank you, Tiger Woods for bringing that word to the forefront for crappy male behavior.)

Most of the "stars" who were asked about Chris's BET Awards performance totally bought into it and actually embraced him. I'm puzzled by this; do these people honestly think that Chris won't hit another chick--or do they just not care? If you'll recall, dozens of actors and recording artists were quoted soon after the incident, that they "felt badly for BOTH of them"--some of them female. Really? BOTH of them?

Have any of you been in an either emotionally or physically abusive relationship, ladies? Or both? I'd like your opinions on this subject. Are you offended by the support of Chris Brown. which is seemingly based on his cry-baby performance?

Oh, and if one single person tries to say this post is "race related", I'm not having it. ABUSE IS COLORBLIND...and so am I, so don't even go there. Just. Don't.

Understood?

Written by: Diva Julia

22Jun/106

Today’s Word of the Day – Entitlementarianism (“Cuz I’m an entitled bitch, baby!”)

Jerry Seinfeld, "Why do we give the FINGER? Why not the TOE?"

That's some major Side-Eye Jerry's givin'.

Jerry Seinfeld is being metaphorically stoned for being pissed off at Lady Gaga's behavior during a Met's home game the other night. I'm not throwing anything at Jerry, but I'm gonna throw some shade at Gaga.

Think about it. You pay an exorbitant amount of money for a private box for season tickets to your favorite team. Another celebrity misbehaves (i.e. wearing underwear and a baseball jersey, proceed to get drunk....blah blah blah...you know the rest from Brittani's post earlier, yes?)

via ESPNNewYork.com

"I don't understand how this is good for her, but I'm sure she understands her milieu better than I ever could," Seinfeld said in an interview on New York radio station WFAN, according to ESPNNewYork.com.

The comedian said he can't believe Mets officials put Gaga in his unoccupied private box without his permission after she flipped off photographers taking pictures of her in the box seats at Citi Field on July 10. "You give people the finger and you get upgraded? Is that the world we're living in now?" Seinfeld joked.

ANYthe-world-revolves-around-ONLY-me.

Here are a few definitions of a word that should be used a bit more these days.

via People's Dictionary, Definition of Entitlementarianism

1. The belief or perception by an individual or group that they have legitimate entitlement or pre-ownership over some thing, circumstance, event or issue that may affect them or others.

2. The notion of rights to things as a direct benefit of birth.

via Urban Dictionary, Definition of Entitlement Bitch:

Person (male or female) who are under the impression that they are the ruler of the world... or at least the establishment they are getting service in. Basically a person who expects to get what he wants in a store, restaurant, etc., with no regard to policies or laws.

Think about the people in your lives. Do you have individuals--who you probably love--who simply cannot understand how their behavior or outlook on life is purely and selfishly incredibly misguided? I am finding Lady Gaga's actions over the weekend altogether too familiar on occasion in my life. (Except that Gaga basically got away with her crap.) I assume I'm not the only one who feels embarrassed or angry with regard to being stuck at the wrong end of an incident involving one of the Entitlement Bitches. Am I?

Tell me your stories. WHY is it always All. About. THEM?

I'm exhausted.

Written by: Diva Julia

20Jun/104

Miley Cyrus dresses like “Pretty Woman” again at 2010 MMVAs!

Oh brother, Miley.

Oh, so demure.

And yes. If Miley keeps wearing rejects from Vivian Ward's ( Julia Roberts' hooker in Pretty Woman) pile of dirty clothes on the bathroom floor, I'm going to continue to prove my point:

Julia Roberts as hooker, Vivian Ward. AGAIN.

Even as a Hollywood hooker, Julia Roberts managed to look a little less trashy than Miley performing on Canada's Much Music Video Awards. Having said that, I have NOT gone back on how I feel about the inappropriate photo pink pig posted last week on Twitter. Still. Wrong.

I just wish that Miley had better taste in stage clothing. Sexy is one thing...ugly is quite another.

Written by: Diva Julia

11Jun/103

Jodie Foster Accused of Battery of 17-Year Old at The Grove UPDATE

Jodie will smack a bitch UP.

What??

Jodie Foster felt it was appropriate behavior to smack up a teenager who was taking a photo of her at the fancy-pants mall in L.A., The Grove. Jodie's GD lucky a 17-year old even recognized her ass. Listen to this. Good LAWD.

Here's the police report, via RadarOnline:

"Vict while at The Grove saw susp and began to take pics of susp with his camera then walked to the valet area of The Grove. Susp followed vict, poked him on his chest, grabbed vict by his left arm causing visible injury."

Who does that? Okay, a lot of a-holes in Hollywood might--but this kid wasn't the paparazzi. He was just a kid with a camera out with his family. It gets better:

via RadarOnline:

"The alleged victim's father told Radar, "Jodie Foster attacked my son at the parking lot at The Grove. Jodie pushed and shoved him leaving scratches and bruises on his arm."The father contends that Foster's behavior horrified her sons, ages 8 and 11.

"She came after him, poked him in the chest and said, 'Do you even have a mother you slime ball?'" "He didn't mouth back at all and was scared of her," he said. "At one point Jodie's son even came over to my son and apologized. Her kids were really embarrassed."

Wait. Jodie's son came over to apologize for his mom's behavior? Somehow I doubt this is the first time Jodie's kids have seem their mom flip out.

Hey, Jodie! You're being a total hot-head and y'all need to simmer the eff down.

Hello, 1-800-LAWYERS?

UPDATE: via People.com

"Jodie Foster is speaking out against allegations that she attacked a young man outside an L.A. mall, telling PEOPLE the accusations and the police report filed by the teenager are a "fabrication" of what really happened.

"This guy was most definitely a professional paparazzo," the actress's rep tells PEOPLE. "He had a large camera bag and 1000mm telephoto lens. He tailed Jodie and followed her all the way from the movie theater to the valet."

Why is it I can still totally picture Jodie pulling this crap? She seems a bit of an angry sort.

Written by: Diva Julia

10Jun/102

Gaga At Sister’s Graduation

Really?

I mean, SERIOUSLY?

Last Thursday, Lady Gaga returned to her old high school, The Convent of the Sacred Heart, on East 91st Street at Fifth Avenue in Manhattan to attend the graduation of her younger sister, Natali. Gaga arrived in "Look At Me Now" style with bodyguards and wearing a see through, lace outfit. I'm sure the bullfighter get up (perhaps inspired by her new video for her latest single Alejandro) raised some eyebrows.

Can you imagine sitting behind someone dressed that looks like Raiden from Mortal Kombat while you're trying to see your child receive their diploma? This isn't even the most ridiculous thing that Gaga has ever worn, but it is ridiculous, even for her.

Once again Lady Gaga makes a spectacle of herself, maybe her sister didn't mind, but this wasn't about her--it was Natali's day. It's okay to tone it down every once in a while, Gaga.

Written by: Brittani

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Managing Editor

DivaJulia is a nutty, sarcastic, yet overly-sensitive former model-turned-photographer and writer. She's also the Managing Editor of Dipped in Cream.

Contributors

Journalist, broadcaster, & twitterati Catherine Kustanczy is just a posh gypsy with a taste for Prosecco, Sinatra, & colorful fire hydrants. Play Anon & on, darlings.

Contributing writer - Catherine Kustanczy

Lisa Foiles is a video game journalist & former star of Nickelodeon's "All That." She currently produces her own web series Everyday Achievements & enjoys Guinness.

Brittani is a 20-something North Carolina native and aspiring writer traveling through life with a martini in one hand and a remote control in the other.