Billboard Music Awards 2013, Full Winners List And Best Ball-Busting Performances – PRINCE, Macklemore, Miguel, Bruno, Taylor…
The 2013 Billboard Music Awards weren't as bad as I thought they would be. Even before the show disappeared for a couple of years, it was always a bit of a second tier awards show. Sunday night the show delivered, if only because of a handful of performances and appearances.
There were the usual suspects, Taylor Swift and her stiff dancing, Nicki Minaj and her fake butt, but the night belonged to two legends, and a girl who unfortunately became the talk of the internet after a rock star move gone wrong. Tracy Morgan was the host, and he was ok, I mean all he had to do was change jackets and read cue cards.
Our dear Bruno Mars kicked off the show with "Treasure" in true Las Vegas style.
Jennifer Lopez did "Live It Up" which is a terrible song, but she still puts on a great show. Props to her for being forty-friggin-two and wearing that outfit, which she also sports in the video.
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Though we are all going through a bit of Pitbull fatigue, he took to the stage to perform "Feel This Moment" with Christina Aguilera and capped off the performance with a guest appearance by Morten Harket of A-Ha singing the classic "Take On Me," which Pitbull's song samples. It was a cute moment and we couldn't help but sing along.
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My only complaint, and one that Kid Rock would echo later while presenting, is that Xtina was singing to a backing track. She certainly didn't need it, but somehow it was louder than her. I don't know what's going on, but I don't like this trend of damn good singers relying on, whether they want to or not, pre-recorded vocals. What is happening to our divas?!!
Will.i.Am would perform "#ThatPower" with Justin Bieber, but more importantly handed Madonna some strange award for touring. Madge strutted on stage wearing practically nothing below the waist. She removed her "pretentious sunglasses' before giving her speech. I'd like to imagine Madonna and Prince backstage comparing squat techniques or something.
Someone who forgot remove their pretentious sunglasses was Bieber, who had a solo performance with "Take You." But it was later when he would accept the "Top Social Artist" award, which isn't even a real thing but whatever, he got booed by the audience. He got defensive, naturally, and told the crowd,
"I'm 19 years old. I think I'm doing a pretty good job. Basically from my heart I really just want to say it really should be about to music. It should be about the craft that I'm making. This is not a gimmick and I'm an artist and I should be taken seriously."
There are so many things wrong with this statement i'm just going to move on.
Miguel has been having a stellar year and getting a lot of recognition for his performing. However, maybe he should have saved the theatrics. During "Adorn" he jumped over the crowd but just missed the stage and landed on a poor girl in the audience.
Her name is Khyati and thankfully she's ok, but now the subject of a meme because this is the internet.
Miguel has gotten many comparisons to Prince, but The Purple One would never put his dainty balls on anyone without asking in the most polite way. Of course, Prince would close out the show, but it felt like it took forever to get to him.
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The lovely and stylish Erykah Badu and Janelle Monae, who should have performed, introduced him and he got to show the kids how it's really done. He did the funky, updated version of "Let's Go Crazy" and a new one, "Fix Ur Life Up." He also received the "Icon Award" which he doesn't need, because he's Prince, bitches.
Nicki Minaj: Top Rap Artist, Top Streaming Artist, Top Rap Album
Justin Bieber: Top Social Artist, Top Male Artist
Taylor Swift: Top Female Artist, Top Billboard 200 Artist, Top Digital Song, Top Country Artist, Top Country Album, Top Country Song
Carly Rae Jepsen: Top Digital Artist, Top Pop Song
Gotye: Top Hot 100 Song, Top Radio Song, Top Streaming Song (Audio), Top Rock Song
Fun.: Top Rock Artist
Rihanna: Top Radio Songs Artist. Top R&B Artist, Top R&B Album, Top R&B Song
One Direction:Top Duo/Group, Top New Artist, Top Pop Artist
Macklemore & Ryan Lewis:Top Rap Song (emphasis: DivaJulia - SEATTLE, BITCHES!!)
Madonna: Top Touring Artist, Top Dance Artist, Top Dance Album
Maroon 5: Top Hot 100 Artist
Adele: Top Pop Album
Psy: Top Streaming Song (Video)
Mumford & Sons: Top Rock Album
Skrillex: Top EDM Album
Who did you love? Who did you wanna choke? Who never entered your mind until you saw them onstage? Who did you miss? TELL US!
Written by: Brittani
Alright Ladies and Gentlemen, lets see if this week's post will give you as much excitement as what stratosphere-jumping, record-breaker, Felix Baumgartner experienced earlier today!
Breaking Bad actor, Aaron Paul, was so excited for Felix - I'm surprised he didn't tweet something like, "YEAH, SPACE JUMP!"
Why on Earth would chef/television personality Anthony Bourdain feel the need to anything that he has to hash-tag as 'anal rampage'?!
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia actor/creator Glenn Howerton gives zero f**ks.
So much about this tweet is face-palm inducing. Last I checked, aren't people what make up a society? Also, *prophets, bro. I don't think anyone in society thinks financial gain is insane. Actor John Cusack should really just stick to holding up boom-boxes outside windows.
Remember when Justin Bieber almost won Shot at Love, with Tila Tequila season 1? I liked him better back then, before he was pulling stupid pranks on his 'Beliebers' and the
Most Dangerous City fine city of Tacoma, Washington.
I must be a noisy oyster because all that noisy noise coming from Khloe Kardashian Odom is annoying me.
What commercial does actress Kirstie Alley have on air currently that she obviously wants us to watch?
Point well made by celebrity blogger, Naughty Rob, but I'd wager it has more to do with no one voluntarily wanting to look further into Hulk Hogan's sex tape story - it's enough to know it exists and, while I love celeb sex tape leaks, even I won't watch that one. Watcha gonna, brother?!
I understood all of Neil deGrasse Tyson's tweet because . . . okay, I understood none of it.
~I was like, good gracious ass bodacious~
Well, who hasn't? Let's be real.
I know that 'Unapologetic' is the name for Rihanna's new album, but what is she unapologetic about? The rumoured hook-up with her abusive ex Chris Brown in New York's Griffin nightclub last week? I'd be a lot apologetic about that, RiRi.
I give myself a coffee enema at least once daily and I'm still not as fabulous as RuPaul.
Is it customary for one to take fashion advice from one's Beard?
I've always been very health conscious.
Would you look this guy? He's now monogramming his stuff with a royal title that he bought. Can Lord Scott Disick buy himself a clue please?
How qualified you are to what? To 'expect'---what exactly? Is this a test? Did I fail? Have I just been found unqualified?
I really hope that actor Simon Rex intended that pun, otherwise, him and John Cusack should be twitter buddies.
I have yet to understand the involvement of 'god' in sports, or rap awards for that matter. Can someone ask the Touchdown Jesus to explain it for me?
So actor Zach Braff's tweet is the reason why some Casanovas have been getting slapped at night clubs all week?
Comments appreciated, tweet y'all next week!
Written by: Ana
By: Linda B
Madonna’s got some issues and she’s working them ALL out on this tour. But first things first.
The weather in New York City wasn’t just bad, it was scary bad. Tornados in Queens and Brooklyn scary bad. I didn’t even think the show was going to happen. Hours of hand-wringing ensued. Of course the show happened. Takes more than some twisty wind to stop shit from going down in the Bronx, yo. The rain came down, so we all just Yankee poncho-ed up and, as we were all worshiping in the Church of the Eternal Madonna for the night anyway, let it become a constant baptism. Washing away our sins, cleansing our souls. Which was helpful, because holy shit, girl’s got some THINGS she is upset about and clearly wants us all to help her through. What, I don’t know. But she’s pissed about something. Or multiple things.
I’ll be honest here, I’m an old-school fan. I want Borderline and Cherish and Lucky Star, all that crap. I don’t even know anything past Ray of Light. So this show was really not for me in theory. Thankfully, my friend has already been all over the world to see her and he prepped me for what was to come. "This is going to be dark. Brace yourself, honey".
Some DJ opened, I couldn’t care less. Spent that time running around trying to find a small concert shirt specifically made for that show with the Yankees logo. Scored! The show started at about 10:20. I’m not fucking kidding you, it opens with a huge epic cathedral on what I heard were the largest screens on a tour ever (does Roger Waters know that??). Looks like you could walk into it and head right into a confessional.
A ginormous thurible spewing incense (maybe just smoke) swings over the stage, monks are chanting in robes, and then you hear the infamous, “GOD?” and the joint goes batshit. And neither she nor the crowd stops to get their breath for at least the next hour. (Seriously. She didn’t stop. Not even for water. Fucking impressive.) And speaking of confessionals, I’m pretty sure that’s what she had in mind for this whole gig. Get in a room and let it out. With her people.
Look, I can go on and on in detail about how the songs were arranged, her lack of any discernible guitar playing skills, mediocre singing abilities, the Botox, the terrifyingly toned muscles... but every other review has done that. What I wanna get into is, what the HELL is going on with her?? I loved every second of it, but it all struck me as someone who narrowly missed having a nervous breakdown a bit ago and has, uh, lived to tell the tale.
Girl Gone Wild into Revolver into Gang bang where there are a LOT of guns and dark imagery and then an elaborate game of dance-y cat and mouse plays out in the set of a cheap hotel room, only to have her shoot said manmouse the in the head. Repeatedly. “Shot my lover in the head.” With dark blood splattering all over the video screen behind her. Yowza! Looked like a Tarantino movie, so I loved it. But it wasn’t for the faint of heart. Or for people looking for Crazy For You.
Moving on we get some Papa Don’t Preach and Hung Up. There’s some other stuff from records I really should own by now but don’t and then into Express Yourself/Born This Way. My globe-trotting Madonna Super Fan and I debated whether Gaga is in on the joke or it’s a bitter jab at the kid. We didn’t agree on it. Also in there somewhere was a kick-ASS marching band segment (they were flying over the stage, for Christ sakes!) and similar stuff to what we all saw during the Super Bowl half-time show. Very cool in person. Added some pep to the rally!
Next up: Berets and Basque. Yeah, I don’t know, either. But she broke it down starting with a long-ish rant about rights and freedoms and letting people be who they are (go on, girl!) which eventually led to some singing in Basque and a completely re-worked version of Open Your Heart. You couldn’t dance to it so much. It was kinda stompy. Cool, but stompy.
All of this was fairly un-joyous. Last time I saw her was on the Blonde Ambition Tour, so I’m used to a fun, happy, sexy romp of pop tunes and buff dancers. While the marching band was a bit of upbeat energy, all of it still felt like she was working out some emotional shit. Deep emotional shit. Madonna’s got some things on her mind and she’s not screwing around anymore. Time to unleash it. I am *totally* cool with that. It made for a much more interesting show. If I wanted a dance party, I could have gone to a club in the Castro. No, I flew 3000 miles to see her in both our adopted home because I wanted to know where she is these days. And hey, I don’t know her from anything, but it strikes me as if she’s been through some hard times and like any real artist, let it out in her music/performance. I was riveted.
Okay, okay, okay, we finally got to the good stuff. My favorite Madonna showed up in her pinstripe pants, a tie and the cone bra. You know her, the overly sexual one who gender-bends her way through hazy, hypnotic orgasm beats. Justify My Love with new but familiar images projecting on the screen. Black and white, wait, what is she doing there, was that a lady or a dude, are they...? YES! Now we’re tawkin’. Vogue/Candy Shop/Human Nature.
Who wants to see a 54-year old woman strip? I do! I do! Thank god, because that’s exactly what she proceeds to do. Or sorta does. You’ve probably already seen the pictures/videos. We weren’t lucky enough to get overt nipple, but we did get a pretty solid amount of ass. (And while we’re on that topic, yes, it IS a solid ass. Whatever, she’s smoking hot. Still.)
Here’s where it gets dark again. By now we all know when she strips down there’s a word-of-the-night on scrawled on her back. Pussy Riot, Obama...tonight we got Forgive.
And then came a few moments about how she has to forgive people, but mostly and firstly, she has to forgive herself. A lone piano man played Like A Virgin in minor chords and she sang it like a funeral dirge, while rolling around the stage, reminiscent of her former trite self. Now THIS was some fascinating stuff.
At one point, we’re pretty sure she was genuinely tearing up. No, it’s wasn’t the rain. Tears, actual tears. She was choked up. Wow. Honestly, that felt like a gift right there. That’s a side of this woman you just don’t run into publicly. She was purging some demons right there. I wasn’t expecting that at all. I even got a little misty over it.
The next piece was a perfect example of why I’ll always love this woman. Nobody Knows Me featured a video montage of very disturbing images, meant to make you upset, make you think, make you FEEL, which culminated in tributes to several young people who have recently taken their own lives after being bullied for being gay. Heartbreaking. Dear Madonna, thank you. I really mean that. You had our backs long before any other public figure did and have not given up on speaking our on our behalf ever since...
(No photos, couldn’t take my eyes off the screens.) Are we having fun yet? In some fucked up way, yeah, totally! The home stretch: I’m Addicted, I’m A Sinner and...ahhhhhhhh....there they are. The gospel choir in their long, graceful robes file out onto the stage, the opening organ notes fill this newly minted cathedral and we finally get everyone’s redemption going with Like A Prayer. You know what’s mind-blowing? Being in a sold-out show at Yankee Stadium with Madonna leading us all in her glorious prayer. Amazing. Get the chills amazing. It was the only “old” song she did in its entirety the way you’re used to hearing it (well, Vogue, too, I guess) and goddamn, thank you for that. At one point she was on the part of the stage that juts into the crowd, rain coming down, arms in the air and I’m pretty sure we saw our former Material Girl get baptized right in front of us. Born again. Fucking excellent.
The show did end with the till then missing dance party. Celebration closed it out, lots of brightly colored cubes, DJs, dancing, her hair down, cutting loose, having a blast. We’ve come full circle. Benediction complete.
I’ve seen hundred of concerts and this was one of the most entertaining I’ve ever witnessed. This is someone who, despite her enormous fame, has struggled for artistic legitimacy every step of the way. I believe she’s damn well earned it with this show. (I’m actually one of those who think she earned it 30 yrs ago, but for my argument’s sake...)
And while it’s been mired in controversy and some negative reviews, I think it’s bold, brave and brilliant. Looking forward to seeing her turn Madison Square Garden into a House of the Holy in November.
All Photos Exclusively Used By Dipped in Cream With Permission By Linda B.
Written by: Guest Reviewer
One of DiC's husbands (whom both DivaJulia and I agree on) is celebrating a birthday. Director David Fincher is turning the big 5-0 and I thought we'd highlight some of his impressive work.
Known for being behind the camera for films like 'Seven,' 'Fight Club' and 'The Social Network,' which earned him a Golden Globe and Bafta for Best Director, he started out his career doing music videos. His first was Jermane Stewart's "We Don't Have To Take Our Clothes Off" all the way back in 1986.
A couple of years later, David would work with Madonna for the first time with "Express Yourself," inspired by Fritz Lang's 1927 silent epic 'Metropolis.'
The two would work together again for "Vogue" and "Oh Father." I wonder if he would ever put her in one of his movies.
It seems 1990 was possibly his biggest video year ever, with "Vogue," Aerosmith's "Janie's Got A Gun, " Billy Idol's "Cradle Of Love" and Don Henley's "End of the Innocence" dominating that year's MTV Video Music Awards in nominations and wins.
George Michael's "Freedom! '90" featuring Cindy Crawford, Naomi Campbell and a number of other Supermodels was nominated for Best Direction, Cinematography and Editing at the 1991 VMAs. Oh, yeah.
As the 90s went on and Fincher focused more on movies and commercials; he directed fewer videos, but there were some standout clips like The Rolling Stone's "Love Is Strong" featuring the band and some gigantic models stomping all over NYC. His last was Nine Inch Nails' "Only", and of course he and Trent Reznor would later work together again when Finchy asked El Rez to score 'The Social Network' and 'The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.'
How about some Bonus Brad Pitt, because we all know Brad is David's favorite!
Lest we forget, the epically creepy and dank opening and closing sequences in the brilliant film Se7en with Nine Inch Nails AND David Bowie. This film is like a warm blanket on a cold night...that may just electrocute us if we're not careful. Oh, but the prickly fun of it all...Closer Remixed and The Heart's Filthy Lesson, respectively set the tone, and then leave us in a heap on the basement floor. Begging. For. More.
Oh, and one more thing...
What's in the BOX?
Written by: Brittani
Just when we thought Elton John could be ANY bitchier, he out-bitches himself. Luckily for us, his rage always seems directed toward Madonna. So, here we go again.
During an interview with an Australian TV chat show which aired on Sunday night, the Bitter Queen Bitch was quite vocal about the other Bitter Queen Bitch, addressing Madonna's latest MDMA tour:
“Why is she such a nightmare? Her career is over, I can tell you that. Her tour has been a disaster and it couldn’t happen to a bigger c***.”
He continued, “If Madonna had any common sense, she would have made a record like Ray of Light, stayed away from the dance stuff, and just been a great pop singer and made great pop records, which she does brilliantly. But no, she had to prove that she was like…” There, Elton trailed off, but then continued, “And she looks like a f***ing fairground stripper.” He also complained, “She’s been so horrible to Gaga” — referring to Lady Gaga, who’s godmother to Elton’s son Zachary.
Written by: Diva Julia