For those of you that don't know, I came to write for DiC after DivaJulia asked me to do a review of 'The Human Centipede'. I have almost completely blocked it from my mind, but now here is the sequel, and even before it premieres it has already been banned in the UK. The British Board of Film Classification has refused to give 'The Human Centipede Part 2: Full Sequence' a rating, which means it's distribution in the UK is illegal. Here is the official ruling from the BBFC, which contains SPOILERS for the movie:
"This new work, The Human Centipede II (Full Sequence),tells the story of a man who becomes sexually obsessed with a DVD recording of the first film and who imagines putting the ‘centipede’ idea into practice. Unlike the first film, the sequel presents graphic images of sexual violence, forced defecation, and mutilation, and the viewer is invited to witness events from the perspective of the protagonist. Whereas in the first film the ‘centipede’ idea is presented as a revolting medical experiment, with the focus on whether the victims will be able to escape, this sequel presents the ‘centipede’ idea as the object of the protagonist’s depraved sexual fantasy."
Folks, if gets worse from there, and trust me, you'll be glad I saved you from the rest of plot. The rest of the ruling concludes with,
"There is little attempt to portray any of the victims in the film as anything other than objects to be brutalised, degraded and mutilated for the amusement and arousal of the central character, as well as for the pleasure of the audience. There is a strong focus throughout on the link between sexual arousal and sexual violence and a clear association between pain, perversity and sexual pleasure. It is the Board’s conclusion that the explicit presentation of the central character’s obsessive sexually violent fantasies is in breach of its Classification Guidelines and poses a real, as opposed to a fanciful, risk that harm is likely to be caused to potential viewers."
So that's that. Director Tom Six made a statement to Empire after being emailed about his response to the BBFC's ruling.
“Thank you BBFC for putting spoilers of my movie on your website and thank you for banning my film in this exceptional way. Apparently I made an horrific horror-film, but shouldn't a good horror film be horrific? My dear people, it is a f**cking MOVIE. It is all fictional. Not real. It is all make-belief. It is art. Give people their own choice to watch it or not. If people can't handle or like my movies they just don't watch them. If people like my movies they have to be able to see it any time, anywhere also in the UK.”
Somebody's mad! Chances are you won't be seeing 'The Human Centipede 2' in the United Kingdom anytime soon. At least not legally.
[Editor's Note: Oh, Brittani! I love how The Human Centipede was the catalyst for your becoming a Contributing Writer for Dipped In Cream! I gotta say, this new film sounds NARST. We both watched the first one, and thanks to Daniel Tosh and his hilarious "Spoiler", it became a bit of a "comedy". (Not to mention a fan-girl fascination with the German actor Deiter Laser who played Dr. Heiter!) As far as Tom Six and his "Full Sequence", I say nothankyouverymuch. ~ DivaJulia]
Thank you, Santa for this wonderful holiday ornament...and thank you, too, for Daniel Tosh.
All I can do now, really is simply quote the Tosh.0 site on Comedy Central:
Answering the question, "What do cookies and milk taste like the second and third time around?
WHAT could be more wholesome?? (Yes. That was said in "Auntie Mame's" voice...)
Written by: Diva Julia
A three person centipede just wasn't enough. What is sure to be the feel-good, shit stained movie of 2011, IFC is blessing us with what is sure to be "the sickest movie of all time." Uh, we'll see about that. IFC president Jonathan Sehring announced that they had acquired the North American rights to the sequel and will be released under IFC's Midnight label. More from the press release:
FULL SEQUENCE has just wrapped shooting in London, and the story is being kept completely under wraps. The only information IFC Films and the producers are revealing is that this time there is a new villain on the scene named Martin and that the premise is 100% medically INaccurate! IFC Films will be releasing THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE PART 2 (FULL SEQUENCE) in 2011.
IFC Films has released a teaser for the film, which premiered on IFC.COM today featuring Six, who prepares viewers for "what really will be the sickest movie of all time." The teaser is on demand nationwide as part of IFC Films’ Direct From Fantastic Fest initiative, in which four movies from the Festival are premiering nationwide on demand.
Martin? They couldn't have come up with a better name for the villain? Oh, Dr. Heiter, you will be missed. I love how they are all a little too excited about this.
"I like to say PART ONE is like My Little Pony compared to the film we are editing now. IFC Films has been such an incredible partner… I can only hope that they won’t be so disgusted that they try to get out of this new deal," Tom Six commented. IFC, specifically their Midnight label, is great about introducing foreign horror, sci-fi and arthouse films to the public. I was able to watch Lars von Trier's Antichrist (which I hated, by the way) and one of my favorite zombie movies, Dead Snow, on their channel. So I do appreciate their dedication to wanting to gross people out. In celebration of Fantastic Fest, you can watch The Human Centipedede (First Sequence) on VOD through October 22.
Oh! Almost forgot! You can PLAY THE GAME, The Human Centipede!!
"You are Dr. Heiter, a brilliant German surgeon who has gone mad and surgically attached people ass-to-mouth to create the Human Centipede. Unfortunately, your patients are not pleased with being human centipedes and have begun to rebel against you.
Now you must take your trusty rifle and put down these human centipedes like the bad dogs they are. Don't forget to watch out for the police and collect glasses of water with roofies to slow down the centipedes!
This Centipede game parody is based on the heartwarming, feel good movie of the year for the whole family to enjoy - Human Centipede. We've just added a variety of medals to it, including a few secret ones you'll surely be able to unlock if you make it far enough in the game. Also included is a high scores list for those of you who are skilled enough to gun down plenty o' those pesky human centipedes to make it into the top ten.
Good luck, Herr Doktor!"
Just in time for the crappy weather season (which is all-year round in Seattle, save 12 days?)--now you don't have to leave your couch--EVER!
I am far from being a prude but I can't imagine I'd want to watch a porn movie based on a man sewing people together. As a friend of mine once told me, "I like my porn vanilla". All I need is a man and a woman having sex. Or two chicks and a guy. Or two guys and one chick. Or....oh wait, what was I saying? This fall, Tom Byron Pictures will introduce us to The Human Sex-ipede. The movie will be directed by Lee Roy Myers, who also directed pron parodies of The Office, Seinfeld, The Golden Girls and Reno 911. (Watch the FunnyorDie.com "review". HILARIOUS--and NSFW. AT. ALL. ) Tom's A XXX Parody series has become pretty popular over the years, even being meta referenced on 30 Rock. Which of course, got it's own XXX Parody.
The plot, as if that even matters with porn, is pretty much the same as The Human Centipede. Myers said that it's a "slapstick version" of the original. It's about 3 tourists who are captured in Germany by a mad sex educator (um, what?!) who wants to sew them together, mouth to genitals.
"You know what, this the perfect concept to base a parody around. Anything putting human faces that close to genitals deserves the porn treatment."
Well, he has a point there. It will be released in October, just in time for Halloween, kids! YAY!
The Human Centipede itself is just a big dare. Can you watch it? Can you watch it without wanting to throw up? I think it has finally achieved the cult status I felt like some people were prematurely giving it. (Picture DivaJulia pouting right about now.)
I could only see myself watching The Human Sex-ipede for laughs. Conjoined humans just don't do it for me.
I've come to realize that I need to add a new "tag" to Dipped in Cream called "Further Proof That DivaJulia is a 12-Year Old Boy". Listen, I ain't too proud to admit it...a-bloody-gain.
You've already heard about my affinity for Beavis and Butthead, South Park, Ren and Stimpy (Oh, John K.), so it should come as NO SURPRISE that I adore Daniel Tosh. Hey, so does my tiny BFF Tana, (aka Bedsore, the Shut In or 4-H Piggy Squeal), so it's not just ME. Someday I'll explain those nicknames, but right now, just laugh at how mean, mean, funny, mean I am to her. Believe me, it's a mutual-meanness, and that's what friends are for...keep smiling, keep shining, knowing you can always count on me, to enter you in the County Fair 4-H Competition because you squeal like a baby pig when you laugh. (Those are the real lyrics, FYI.) Just know that Tana is about 5'1" and 100 lbs., AND completely darling. THAT'S why I'm so mean to her.
Okay, back to the matter at hand. Tosh.0 + Human Centipede = Hilarity.0
|Spoiler Alert - Human Centipede - Uncut|
Please don't think less of me. (Psssh....like you don't already know I'm a complete junior high kid.)
Written by: Diva Julia